‘Beat the pussy up’ – the way we talk about sex with women

This blog contains a discussion of violent language to discuss sex, sexual violence and porn. It also contains the titles to real porn films that a lot of people may find disturbing. Please take care of yourself whilst reading this and seek support after reading if you need to. 

As a massive old skool (and sometimes new skool) RnB, Rap and Hip Hop fan, I often find myself experiencing some pretty serious cognitive dissonance to try to enjoy my music without yelling at the radio or crying into my crisps.

As a younger feminist, I used to tell myself that it was okay that women were called bitches and hoes because that’s the way that artist chose to express themselves (I know, I know, so progressive).

As I got older, I started to resent the use of the word ‘bitch’ in my once-favourite songs. I stopped listening to some artists…

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Deep in thought 

Deep in thought 

Because 

I can’t be deep in action 

I was bred too highly

To get my hands dirty 

So I relegate this task 

To people who have no other jobs and then 

I act like I’m doing them a favour 

By paying their wages 

And treating them slightly better than 

Animals

I criticise their food choices

And the way they eat it

Calling their lifestyle violent 

While ignoring the silent violence 

I inflict on them daily

I am India’s upper caste, intellectual elite.

My head is in the clouds

 And I don’t know one grassroots from another 

All of it is just, 

Foliage to me.

Coming in the way of ‘development’.